Tuesday, March 13, 2012

March 2012 -- Maybe Baby?

That's the date I've had in my head for awhile.
The month I thought {maybe} we'd start trying for baby #2.
Getting pregnant this spring meant we'd have a winter babe.
 I don't have to suffer through the 3rd Tri in the heat of summer again.
It also put the kids about 2 1/2 years apart.
Sounds good to me.
I remember last year when I put this possibility into my mind.
 How far away it seemed at the time.
How could I possibly wait that long.
I had the fever and I had it bad.
And now here it is.
March 2012.
And the thought of Baby #2 isn't even on our radar.
Funny how things change.
Seeing a lot of women who had babies around the same time as Jamie now pregnant with number 2, I expected the jealousy and baby fever to creep up.
Actually the opposite has happened.
Every time I see a newborn or catch wind of another pregnancy announcement,
my first thought is....oh how exciting....Congrats!
My second thought?
Better you than me.
Yep I said it.
I can't wait to oohhh and awww and snuggle all over YOUR baby...and then when it starts to cry...give it right back.
Every time Jamie has a little sleep regression and we're up constantly throughout the night I'm immediately reminded how NOT ready I am to go through that all over again.
I keep telling all the nosy "when's baby number 2 coming??" askers that until daycare is buy 1 get 1 free, it's not happening.  Or I say when they're willing to foot the bill on the next one.  Usually shuts 'em up pretty fast.
And while that is true. 
Two in daycare is currently financially impossible for us right now, what it really boils down to is we just aren't ready.
Jamie is in the throws of toddlerhood.  He's fun.  He's learning.  He's inquisitive.
But quite frankly he's exhausting.
My 1st Trimester with him consisted of 24/7 "functional" nausea and bedtimes of 7pm.
How the heck would I do that with a wildebeest toddler running around.
And the thought of him AND a needy newborn?
Hold me.
I know lots of people do it all the time.
But for me?  If I get to choose?
I say no thanks.
Maybe next year.
And until then, I'm thankful for the rest of you and all your upcoming newbies to help keep my baby fever at bay!



Lindsey said...

I am already cringing at paying both daycare AND for preschool. Preschool around here is only 2 hours, twice a week. So not only will we be paying $100 a week for daycare, then add an additional $90 a month for Connor to get "socialized" for 4 hours a week. Granted, preschool is housed in the same school building I teach in, do I really need to send Connor to preschool at the age of 3?

Cheryl E. said...

Oh my gosh you took the words right out of my mouth. I feel the same exact way!!!

Tiffany said...

You'll know when the time is right!! :) I can tell you that as SCARED as I was, 3 under 18 months isn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be. ;)

SG to SP said...

I can't even imagine having to chase a toddler around right now on top of taking care of a newborn. Although I do say I would like to have Hunter and his younger sibling to be about 3 years apart. Plus I want to be done having kids by the time I'm 35when the risk of bad things increases. So I'll probably suck it up and do it anyway.

And definitely shoot for a winter baby. I love having a winter baby (though not necessairly a xmas baby). It's nice being on maternity leave and hibernating in the house during the cold weather and it gives you a few months to get back in shape before bathing suit season.

Gwen said...

And now you see why I only have one. For a time I thought I would have another one. Then I would think the same things you are now and after a while I knew that I would only have one. I know you'll have more and I can't wait to snuggle with your next baby....one day. And then pass him/her back to you. LOL!

Kristen at First Name Smith said...

couldn't have said it better myself.

Ashley said...

I'm due soon with my first and I always said I wanted at least two. I've had the easiest of pregnancies and feel so thankful. But even though it's been a breeze? Baby #2 is still up in the air. I expected the cost of what daycare will be but I'm with you! 2 at that price? Yeah.Right. Only if I could print my own money! ha! But I can also see your point, when you have do deal with all the newborn stuff again, how can you deal with a toddler, being a wife, working, home chores? Seems overwhelming. So while I've never wanted to only have 1 child, it's completely possible that I do, or that I wait until I can get my son into preschool or kindergarten!

Ashley said...

YES!! This is exactly how I feel right now! We had always planned to start trying for #2 in January 2012. I could hardly wait to have another one. Then, one day I woke up and thought, I don't want another one!! Cooper is more than enough to handle right now. And daycare? We would be so financially strapped with 2 in daycare. So many people are pregnant/having babies right now, including close friends, and I seriously thought I would be jealous, but when I went to see my friend's newborn last week? Not ONE pang of jealousy! Crazy how things happen like that.

Becky said...

You said it sista! Harper is only 15 months and we already get this question :)

Brown Girl said...

I'm not even itching to have one baby even though everyone keeps asking...I'm going to write a post about that, it's really annoying.

Erin said...

Holla! I couldn't agree more :) If I had a dollar for every time I thought, "I'm so glad it's YOU and not ME"...well, I would have a lot of dollars :)

August 2012 is the date I have in mind. But who knows if I'll be ready that early? The uterus wants what the uterus wants...

Melissa said...

I am so with you! We are not planning on trying for another baby until Landon is 3, so June 2014 at the earliest. If I decide then that I'm still not ready, then we will wait longer. I do miss being pregnant in the sense that I miss having a cute belly and feeling my baby move inside of me. However, now that I know how much work a newborn is and how little sleep you get for months, there is no way in hell I want another one anytime soon and the thought of it right now terrifies me. I don't know how people have 2 or more close in age. My husband has 2 co-workers that will have 3 kids under age 4 very soon. I'd die.

d.a.r. said...

Haha. I had my 6 week appointment today and the first question I asked was "how soon is it safe/healthy to have another?". My doctor died laughing and told me that women ask that question more than she would have ever guessed prior to practicing medicine. If it works out, it works out. Right now Jack is a pretty big handful :). I may be singing a much different tune in a few months, but who knows. In the meantime, you can always get your newborn baby fix over here!

Katie said...

I'm with you too, mama! I used to think I wanted my kids to be two years apart, but that would mean I would need to be pregnant right now, and if it's up to me, that's not happening! lol Emmy is a super easy baby so I'm not completely worried about juggling two, BUT I don't want two in diapers. I told my husband that once Emmy is potty trained, THEN I'll START to think about #2. (ha... no pun intended) Also, I'm having too much fun enjoying my little girl, that I'm not ready to share my time with her.
(plus there's the fear of going through PPD again)

Molly said...

Well, I'm glad you know yourself and your feelings and are staying true to them no matter how many people are having their second baby!

It is hard to be pregnant with a toddler. Oh goodness, is it! Sometimes I think about having a third and then we have a bad day and I'm like nooooo, sir. :)

dave and jenn said...

Even though I am so sleep deprived today, I would love to have another. Dave isn't convinced though, and both of us agree that it shouldn't be any time soon!

I think it's great that you are waiting and not putting pressure on yourself to have them close together.

Kristen said...

my kids are spaced apart and I LOVE it! Makes life so much easier. My oldest is 8, I'm due in June with my 3rd, and once that third one is born my 2nd will almost be 4. So much easier to handle!

Nikki said...

Amen Sista!

Carol {Everyday Delights} said...

You will totally know what is right for you guys! Maybe next year, the year after or whatever!

Crazy Shenanigans-JMO said...

Josh's son is turning 5 and with him running around the house, I'm exhausted. I can't imagine trying to take care of him and have a newborn!

Katie @ Loves of Life said...

I sometimes even feel crazy, like WHAT DID YOU DO? bahah. But it's all good, it'll work out. I honestly saw myself waiting longer but someone (ahem, husband) was pushy about it. There WILL be a larger gap between #2 and 3 IF there even is a 3...like...lots of years. And I think that's okay. There is no set # of years that's perfect for everyone, you just do what works.

Perfectly Imperfect said...

I could not agree more! I thought we'd start trying when BG turned two. Umm.. that's in two weeks. And we haven't done any of the necessary things to even think about trying. So yea. It's not even on our radar. Right now, I'm so good with one. Maybe that will change.. but.. maybe not!