2011 has come and gone.
Another 365 days behind me.
I can't say I'm too sad to see it go.
It wasn't that it was a horrible year, but there wasn't anything extraordinary that happened.
It was dull. Lackluster. Like living on autopilot.
I feel like an entire year has passed me by.
I want more for 2012.
I want to actually live it.
Make changes. Improve relationships. Most importantly improve myself.
After my mom died I feel like anything I had planned got put on the back burner.
I went into survival mode, burying myself in the mundane tasks of everyday life to avoid having to feel anything. I've walked around in a bit of a fog, a smile on my face to get by, but that's about all I've done.
Everything basically gets the bare minimum because it's all I have to give.
But I deserve better.
My family deserves better.
My mom would want better for me.
I'm not usually one for New Year's resolutions, but I couldn't think of a better time for change.
Or a better time to stop avoiding life.
The time is now and I'm looking forward.
A New Year. A fresh start.