Come on Columbus Disgrace...really!?

So the headline of today's paper:
"The Swine Flu is Probably Here"

Probably?? Seriously? Don't you think you should confirm that before making it your headline story? Looks like I have to wear my mask from here on out, SARS style.

They're baaaaack!

So the only person who probably understands my excitement over this is my friend Adam Clements. And the chance that he even remembers this is pretty slim. When he and Bob were roommates they had these fantasticaly cool fish glasses....way too cool for two college guys to have bought. Well it turns out Adam's older sister who worked at Crate&Barrel in NYC at the time had given them to him as a housewarming gift. I pined over them for years, threatening many a time to steal them in my purse at one of their infamous girly drink parties. I tried endlessly to find them, but came up empty handed every time. When Cbus finally got a C&B I again sought out to find them. Nothing. Well! A mere 5 years later, what do I find in my mail box today? A C&B catalog....with fish glasses on the cover! EEK! Now mind you, I need more glassware like I need holes in my head, but you bet your ass these glasses will be mine! Oh yes, they will be mine!

Little werid.....

Ok. So when it came to our wedding ceremony I will admit we were pretty traditional. We weren't even allowed to do a unity candle which I thought was the most common. Some of the new ones out there, like the sand ceremony, though not my style, are at least a nice keepsake of the day. This one however, is just plain werid. Who does this?!? I can only imagine the look on Fr Jerry's face had I proposed this.....

Honey Ceremony
As honey is a symbol of the sweetness of life, Bride and Groom each dip a finger into a bowl of honey and then drip it onto to the tongue of their loved one.

Seriously?! Gross!

Oh how I love thee....

let me count the ways.....

You bring me roses.....even if they are from your boss in honor of Administrative Assistant's Day

When I tell you I can't cook dinner because the chicken went "funny", code for "it's hotter than fukc in here and I'm not cooking".....you pick up dinner AND get the delicious steamed dumplings I love

You rub my feet....even though I have to beg and wave them in your face first claiming I "could" be carrying your future child

You rub my feet while watching Gossip Girl....secretly enjoying every minute of it and totally agreeing with me that Blair and Nate are boring and Chuck rules

You are obsessed with America's Funniest Home Videos and laugh excessively every time you watch it....even though none of the videos are funny

You snuggle with me even though you hate it....mainly because I've allowed you set the A/C to "artic" and no one wants to risk waking Moose to get the blanket back

When I said, "Let's get a VW Routan" You said "Ok".......when I said, "We have to abide by Brooke Shields rules though and have a baby first" and you said, "Ok, how's tomorrow work for you"



Thanks hun! I love you too!

Congrats Matt & Emily!!!

Adam and I officially passed our newlywed torch to our good friends Matt and Emily yesterday. What a gorgeous day to get married!! Who would have guessed we'd be baking in the sun at an outdoor wedding in April....in Ohio! The bride looked amazing as she walked down the aisle, her gown sparkling in the sun. And the Darby House was the perfect setting for such an outdoor loving couple. We had a blast dancing with "Delila" and enjoying our cake....we love you Anita! Here's a few pictures. Let the wedding season begin with two more to go this summer!

Newlywed 15??

So I've heard of the Freshman 15....what about the newlywed 15?? I went to put on the same dress I wore a mere few months ago to our rehersal dinner and was astonished at what I saw. I'm bound and determined to still wear it, consider it motivation. The darn thing did still manage to zip up, though I may not be able to breath for the next few hours.....

4 and counting....

So our elusive potential buyer as been to our place 4, yes 4 times. The last time she came under an alias with a different real estate agent. I kid you not. I couldn't make this up if I tried. She really wants our place, but is now claiming compared to comps in the area it's WAY overpriced. If that's the case....why come 4 times. Man up and put in an offer already bitch....I dare you.

Someone's getting kicked in the vagina

Ugh. So the girl who wouldn't make an offer until the floors were done came today. I got an email from our real estate agent today that said she loved them and really likes our place. Ok. Great! So where's our offer?? She's going to look at more places today and tomorrow....just to make sure this is "the one." Oh for heaven's sake! Seriously? Seriously? What exactly was she doing all of last week while waiting for the floors to be installed. Obviously sitting around with her thumb up her butt. I HATE HATE HATE indecisive people. Maybe because when I make a decision, I stick with it. If I like the first one, I get it. I don't have to look at 100 others to know I like the first one. After seeing the place three times and loving it, I don't understand the need to look more. Ugh. That's all I have to say about that.

To top off my frustrating day, in honor of earth day they've decided to have freakin' festival in the park. No warning. No signs. No emails from the condo association letting us know. I got home last night/early morning to find ALL the meters bagged and the street blocked. WTF?!? It was 3:00am, I parked at one anyway, everyone else was. Well pretty soon this morning the 5 million porta potty's get delivered. A beer truck sets up. All the hippies set up their hemp and tie dye tents. And of course....the gazebo stage....where the next "american idol" is belting the tunes. Lovely. All I want to do it catch up on my laundry watch some tv and enjoy a little fresh air with my windows open. Is that to much to ask for?!?

Alleluia!

The floors are done! No more cramped living with all our stuff in one room! They really look good, so hopefully all those potential buyers out there agree. The dogs aren't so sure about them though. It's basically turned our house into one giant doggie slip and slide. We also didn't purchase any area rugs since we don't plan on being here long, plus I want to show off the floors I just spent my life savings on! You have to be careful not to sit on any of the furnitre with a lot of gusto though or you're sliding back. We have a third showing with the same girl on Sunday.....we're hoping she makes an offer. Fingers crossed!

Only in my dreams

Last night I had a dream I was pregnant. I wasn't like big belly pregnant, but Adam was obsessed with touching and talking to my still flat stomach. I've already joked I won't have any children with him cause I already rank #3 behind Kasey and Moose and I refuse to be #4. Now even my imaginary pregnant belly has upstaged me. Oh the woes of an attention starved wife. :)

Overrated

So after listening to all the hype, I finally caved awhile back and read the first Twilight book. I finished it, only because I kept praying it would get better. It never did. I was bored by the authors attempt to overwrite a bad book about teenage angst and forbidden love. Are all those big words really necessary?? Did she have a pocket thesaurus with her at all times? It was like watching a bad episode of Dawson's Creek. Teenagers, hell grown adults, don't talk like that even if they are 300 yr old vampires. I have yet to find another person who agrees with me. I'm like the black sheep of the entire literate population, and I'm ok with that. At least I won't waste my time or money on books 2, 3 or 4. I did however, make the mistake of watching the movie. I thought a little movie magic might make the story more interesting. WRONG! The move is just as, if not more, boring than the book. And, brace yourselves, I don't think Edward is that attractive. Maybe it's just me, but I don't go for freaky looking pale dudes with WAY too big hair.

Floors day 2

Getting closer! The kitchen/entry way area is complete and the appliances are back in their rightful homes. I did not however use this as an excuse to cook, oodles, yum. The bathroom has been started, as well as about half of the dining room. With as much as there is left to do I'm guessing he will not finish tomorrow. Looks like we have a few more days of living on our bed!

When I have kids....

After working in a pediatric office for over five years I thought I was immune to snotty little tween girls. Well this morning I had one that takes the cake. After calling her name, she stares at me and sarcastically says, "Yeah. What?!" Umm. It's your term dumbass let's go. With her mother sitting right there she continues to hem and haw and drag her feet. No more than 2 steps into my room she's complaining about the tv show. "I don't like that, give me the remote." Umm. No. I tell her I can't control what's on tv at what time and you most certainly can not have my remote. She pouts but sits down. She then continues to complain and whine. I don't like this, I don't like that. Ugh. I hate that flavor. Why do I have to be here. On.....and on.....and on. At one point she says, "I don't like nurses or dentists" At which I replied, "lucky for me I'm none of those." She wants to know what I am them, I tell her I'm not saying. Hey. Two can play at this game. Finally done, I send her across the hall while seeing her brother. She's playing with the chair, turning the lights on and off, changing the tv channel....and finally answers her ringing cell phone. Oh hell no. This pretty much goes on the entire time she's in the office, until finally her mother comes to take her home. I swear...if I ever have a child who not only treats me, but another adult that way, the won't have two legs to stand on. Kids these days have no respect.

There's a lot of crap in our bredroom....

So the floor installation has begun!! Last night we (and by we I mean me) worked on clearing out all the closets and moving as much furniture into the bedroom as possible (ok Adam DID help with the hard labor). Those little mover disc things really work! So basically we've moved 800 sq ft into 200 sq ft. Sort of. The fridge is where the couch used to be. The stove in the middle of what used to be the living room. The computer armoire and TV are in the hallway between the bedroom and bathroom. Luckily we've been able to rig up the internet on the lap top......and the bedroom TV is still in fine working order. Though Adam reminds me regularly that it doesn't have the guide....or DVR. Whatever. Be glad it has cable. So far the new floors are looking great!! Can't wait for Wednesday when we can put the house back together.

Before Demo

After Demo (that's actually the new flooring and our concrete subfloor)

Before Demo

After Demo (Again new floors and subfloor) That's where the fridge and stove usually are

Here's where the fride and stove currently are

Our craptastic bedroom

Honeymoon pictures!!!

Here are a few pictures from our awesome honeymoon cruise! It's hard to believe that only 2 weeks ago we were cruisin' the open seas on our way to Panama. Adam still faithfully carries his sail in sign card in hopes someone will accept it. At least spring has sprung here in Cbus.....it helps a little as I watch my tan fade away. Rainy sail away from Ft Lauderdale. We LOVED our balcony!

Our trusty vessel, the Carnival Miracle. We were in the section of rooms that juts out between the life boats. It was the perfect location.

Welcome to Colon, Panama

Adam prepares himself for the Hochimen boats

And we're off!

Welcome to the Embera Indian Village

Coming soon to a National Geographic near you

Mini bananas in Costa Rica

Monkeys!

Geared up for the zip line

Costa Rica - View from the top

Tender boats to Belize

Belize

Eek!! Girly porn!

The new Columbus Bride is out! Yes, I realize I am no longer engaged and done wedding planning, but whatever, there will always be a little bride in me. Luckliy I never went through that whole wedding depression thing. That would have been a little over the top, even for me. I had a pefectly fulfilling life pre-wedding planning, my life was not over as soon as I said "I do." My wedding dress does still hang on our bedroom door, partly due to lack of space in our 800 sq ft and partly because I'm not quite ready to part with it. I will fully admit to trying it on occsionally, but I haven't convinced Adam to lace up the back yet, and until I do, I told him it will remain right where it is. Haha. Maybe one day I'll take it to be cleaned and boxed up for eternity. Until then, here's to dreaming about the fall Columbus Bride where perhaps I'll find myself among the pages. Eek!

Sell baby sell!

So we bit the bullet. After talking Lowe's down an astonishing $1,ooo on the new floors, we went for it. We are now soon to be proud owners of Brazillian Cherry engineered wood floors. What are "engineered" wood floors you may ask? Well I'm not entirely sure myself, but here's what I've gathered from the many explanations I've got. The core of the flooring is similar to that of laminate, but then a thin layer of actual wood is veneered to the top. The best part is, the price is closer to that of laminate, but the look is more like wood. Since we can't have actual wood on our crappy concrete subfloor....it's the next best thing. It doesn't make it any easier to stomach that much money when you're basically spending it on someone else. If however, it helps sells this place, than I'm game. The way I look at it, we aren't going to sell at our current asking price without all the upgrades people want. If spending a little jackasauraus means we sell at or near 189,900 then I'm game. If it doesn't sell, then I guess we have some really sweet ass floors to enjoy. Fingers and toes crossed people. We need a house!!!