Wednesday, September 11, 2013
My new normal
The husband was asleep.
The boy was asleep.
The dog was asleep.
Hell, the sun was barely peeking it's head over the horizon.
I hopped into my car, breakfast in hand, and began my drive to work.
You see with my new job, came a new commute. A 45 minute commute to be exact.
So that means by the time I get off work, I'm walking in the door around 6-6:15 pm.
That's almost half my day.
I've been managing pretty well. It helps that I love my new job, it's basically my dream job. And the husband? Well he's been amazing and has picked up the slack big time now doing drop off and pick up at daycare and getting dinner started.
The first three weeks back into the swing of things, everything was going great.
But today? Today I cracked.
As I got into my car at 5:30 pm and began my drive home my mind started to race. I hate not being able to get Jamie up and dressed in the morning. I miss picking him up from school and our hour of so just us, hanging out, winding down and getting dinner started. Now I walk in the door, help finish cooking dinner, we sit down to eat around 7 and by the time we finish it's almost time to get ready for bed. I'm feeling some serious mom guilt.
Sure these long days during the week now mean I get Friday's off. Oh how I love having my 3 day weekends back. Plus it means an entire day just Jamie and me, but I'm not sure it makes up for the fact that Monday through Thursday, I basically seem him a combined 8 hours total. In four days.
I know it's all still pretty new, so I'm still giving myself time to adjust, but right now my mama heart hurts as we all get used to our new normal.