Thursday, March 25, 2010

F....as in F'ing shoot me now!

I knew I left that darn thing somewhere!

So I finally went to get some new bras.
The old ones just weren't cutting it anymore and I don't see any relief in the near future.
In fact from what I hear, it's only going to get worse.

I joyfully walk into the Maternity store, hubs in tow, to see just how big the girls were.
The cheery sales woman offers to measure me first, so I agree.
Easier than a giant guessing game right?

This is where the fun stops.

I went in wearing my pre-pregnancy bra, an already huge 38D.
I left with two bras boulder holders in a size 42F.
I actually almost cried when she told me I was an E but that I better get the F for growth.
I looked at her very seriously and said....do you even MAKE that size.
She laughed and walked me to the back...where they hide the big ones...and showed me my choices. Ugly and uglier.

So what's my husband doing this whole time? Consoling his poor wife? No. Grinning from ear to ear. Not because he's taking pleasure in all my pain and embarrassment...but because he thinks it's AWESOME that his wife has such huge boobs.

"But hun, don't you know how lucky you are?!? Most women have to pay for boobs that big"

Great. Thanks for the uplifting words. They're really helping me right now as I buy this bra with a trap door in it for easy access. And no hun, that doesn't mean easy access for YOU! Nice try though.

Shoot me now.


16 comments:

SG said...

While I would love bigger boobs an F just sounds painful! You poor thing!

Brittany Ann said...

Well, two things...

if it's any consolation, I hear they do return once the baby has been weaned.

and two, I pray one day pregnancy will give me boobs that don't look a 12-year-old boy. Which means you're my new hero!

And your husbands! Tell him to live it up while he can!

Men...so insensitive to how painful beauty can be...

Gwen said...

Girl I feel your pain...slightly. I was a C when I got pregnant with Ellie. Ended up wearing an E while nursing and then had to shop in the little girls section for training bras after. I shrunk to nothing. Then I decided to take matters into my own hands so to speak but now I wish I would have gone just a little smaller.

Brittany's right though. They shouldn't always stay an E or F and next time the hubs makes that comment kick him hard. Blame it on pregnancy hormones. We'll allow it for a few more months. LOL!!

Marjorie said...

I'm actually a DD pre-pregnancy so I'm not looking forward to moving on to those hideous grandma looking things in the next few weeks. One thing I've learned is that, unlike VS which seems to think that large breasted women don't have sex lives, Lane Bryant actually carries pretty bras in enormous sizes. Obviously you'll need nursing bras, but if you want to pick up a few pretty things to wear in the meantime, check them out. Their prices are way lower than VS and they have sales a LOT.

Molly said...

Oh my gosh, I am laughing! Sorry but I am. It's just part of the gig. I went from perky B's to double D's after Landon was born. Then after I stopped breastfeeding they went back to C's but were most definitely not perky.

Now that I'm on baby #2, I definitely see a breast lift in my future! Pregnancy does all sorts of not-really-fun things to your body.

But I'll just be cliche and tell you it's all worth it x1000!

Crazy Shenanigans said...

I had no idea they made bras that big, I mean I'm sure yeah because of the pregnancies but I never realized! Don't worry, you know they'll go down one day.

Jules said...

I’m sorry, but this cracks me up. You and the Mr. are so funny. That is completely how Geof would have acted too. I know nothing about pregnancy other than what people have told me, but I’m sure they will go back to normal. Take comfort in that!

Brown Girl said...

Oh my goodness, you make me laugh!! I would have no clue what to do with those things since I lack so much in that department!!!

Lindsey said...

Oh no! That sounds awful! I can't relate though. I have never had extra clevage and still don't even now that I am pregnant. Boo!

Hilary Lane said...

My sister went from a 34C to a 34DD when she was pregnant. I'm already at a 34DD, so I'm pretty worried about what's going to happen when I do. I'll probably be in the same boat as you!

Brittany said...

Oh, that made me laugh because I know my hubs would be doing the same thing! I'm sure after the pregnancy you will go back down to your regular size. Try to think of the positives and that you're doing it for your little bundle of joy!!

Jamie Pickle said...

My hubby would act the exact same way....so typical!

Newlywed Next Door said...

Hilarious! I guess he's just making lemonade out of lemons!

Jen said...

Aw, poor Mrs. EyeCanSee. I can't say I envy you, but I hope it gets better! At least you're getting the support you need; that's so important.

Raylene Nicole said...

Oh my word... I almost peed my pants when I read 'boulder holders'... hahaha... you're hilarious... which is why I totally love your blog! and I love learning about preggers time from you b/c you have fun with it all!

d.a.r. said...

Oh. my. word. I hope you aren't in too much pain!!!