FORE!

Happy Halloween from the future Tiger Woods.

Minus that whole cheating man whore part of course.

Trick or Treat Friends!

Missing you Always

Dear mom,

It's hard to believe it's been 2 whole years since we said our goodbyes.

They say time heals all wounds, but I lost a piece of myself the day you left and I know that no amount of time will ever replace or fill that void.

Missing you always, but especially today.

xoxo,

Em

Friday Confessional

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Last week the hubs and I had some Champagne to toast my 75 pound victory.  I drank about half the glass and felt tipsy.  I think it's safe to say that your average high school girl has a higher tolerance than I do.

I'm not a fan of piercing baby ears.  I think it takes away that rite of passage of being a girl.  I still remember the day my mom and I went to good ole Claire's to get mine done and I can't wait to do it with my maybe one day daughter.

We desperately need some high school girl who can occasionally babysit for us, but I don't know a single one.  There's a girl who waits for the bus every morning at the bottom of our culdesac and I want to ask her, but I'm afraid I'll look like some weird lady pimping out young girls in her SUV.  Plus I'm too chickenshit to even ask.

Work has really cracked down on cell phone usage, to the point that they claim if they see you using it they have the right to take it away until the end of the day.  Seriously.  What am I....12??  So now it sits in the cabinet and I've realized how addicted I really am.  My hands get all twitchy every time I think I may have an email.  Or missed something epic on Instagram.  I think I need a 12 step program.

Unless you're taking your pet to the groomers please don't take them to pet stores.  It's dumb.  While I realize it's allowed, Sparky doesn't give a crap if he accompanies you to buy a new bag of food.

I used to have my exes email password and shortly after we broke up, I would check it on the regular.  Yep.  That's me.  The crazy stalker ex.

I often hide in the kitchen and eat so my toddler doesn't see me and beg for some himself.

I spent an obscene amount of money on a stuffed Willy the Wildcat at Target because of the look on my child's face when he saw it.  Who has two thumbs and no will power?  This girl.

If you ask Jamie what he's going to be for Halloween, he will tell you Mickey Mouse.  Except when we went to try on the MM costume, he flat out refused to wear the ears, so I refused to spend $40 on the costume.  He's going as a golfer instead.  He's two.  He really won't know the difference.  Mom fail.

Whew.  Feels good to get that off my chest.
Now go link up and spill your confessions!

Thankful Thursday

Plugging right along with my 31 days of giving thanks!

This week I'm thankful for....

 

 

 

The snap of 80 degree weather we've been having.  Sure I about died when I had to turn the AC back on.  Yep I grumbled when I had to dig Jamie's summer wardrobe back out of storage.  But this morning when the temps dropped 30 degrees and it was cold and rainy, I was quickly reminded how nice it was to have had a few more days of Indian Summer!

 

My husband.  He's kind of been a silent supporter during this whole weight loss hoorah.  I know he's proud of how far I've come, he's just not always the most vocal about it.  Well this week when I hit 75 pounds {HOT DAMN!} he sent me an email that made my heart skip a beat.

 

Half days.  I haven't taken any time off work in for.ev.er, but tomorrow I'm cutting out early and I can't wait!!

 

Hair appointments.  It's been over 6 months, to say I'm overdue would be an understatement!  Next Friday can't come soon enough!!

 

Our good friend who's going to take some new family pictures for us!  I love having a few "photographers" in my circle of friends!

 

Pay Day.  Sure money may not buy happiness, but it helps pay the bills and keep a roof over our heads....and that makes me happy!

 

The DVR and unlimited episodes of Caillou.  For without it, I would never be able to get dinner on the table.

Come on back tomorrow with all your confessions!

Eff.Marry.Kill

It's that time of year again!  Time for another edition of....

This time around I chose a few members of the classic 80s Brat Pack from one of my favorite movies

The Breakfast Club

Eff:  Bender.  Because everyone knows you don't marry the bad boy.

Marry:  This one was tougher.  Do I go with the jock or the geek?

I say go geek.

No body wants to end up the the guy who peaked in high school.

Plus Brian's mom is awesome. 

And maybe she'd let us borrow the ole family shaggin' wagon.

Kill:  Andrew.  Sorry Sporto, but you's got to go.

  

Now go link up with your own E.M.K trio!
Happy Tuesday friends!

The Great Pumpkin is Coming

Here it comes.

The obligatory Pumpkin Patch post.

It's fall.  The leaves are changing.  Halloween is fast approaching.

So we did what every other family did this weekend.

Headed to the Pumpkin Patch.

We thought we'd mix it up and try somewhere new.

They had tons of fun things to do and Jamie had a blast exploring the "punkin patch"

He even rode the barrel train by himself!

After he flat out refused to ride it the first time around, imagine my surprise when all of a sudden he said he was going to do it "by myself!"

 As you can see, we pretty much did it all!

Now if only I could get some cider donuts my fall would be complete!

Happy Monday Friends!

Friday Confessions

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Saturday morning Jamie woke up bright and early.  So I let him watch an obscene amount of Caillou while I sat on the couch and caught up on blogs.  Parenting from the couch for the win!

I'm all for Breastfeeding.  Public.  Private.  Wherever.  If your kids gotta eat, your kids gotta eat.  I don't however enjoy seeing bare breast or an aereola shot while breastfeeding on my instagram feed.

I can count on one finger the amount of times I've smoked pot, but anytime I catch the clock at 4:20 I giggle like I'm some kind of stoner.

I had another confession here, but my husband convinced me it was too bad and I had to delete it.  I know.  I'm such a tease.  If you promise not to judge, maybe I'll include it next week.

I'm lucky if I wash my bras every few weeks.

Same goes for sheets.  I know I'm gross.  {Hangs head in shame}

Until recently, I thought the infamous Chicago bean....was in Boston.

Monday was a beautiful day.  Probably one of the last warm days we'll have for a while.  So I left work 30 minutes early for an "appointment."  Which really meant I was playing hooky to take my son to the park.

I can't stand it when parents give their child normal, traditional names but spell them weird.  You didn't just give your kid a unique name.  You just gave your kid a common name that now no one can spell or pronounce.

I put a Halloween witch up by our front porch and when the dog growled and barked at it from the window like it was a real person I totally made fun of him.  The next day when backing out of the garage I caught the witch out of the corner of my eye and jumped for a second thinking it was a real person.  I did it again the following day.

Two years in a row Shutterfly has asked me to be a part of their Christmas card giveaway.  This year they didn't and I'm pretending I don't care when really I'm pissed and tempted to buy my cards from somewhere else.  You know, because I'm sure they'd really notice the loss of my business.

Happy freaking Friday Ya'll!
Now go cleanse your soul with your own confessions!

Thankful Thursday

My 31 days of giving thanks continues!

 

This week has been crazy.  Crazy at work.  A few little stresses at home.  I'm still trying to get over this stupid cold.  And of course this time of year is always a bit heavier on my heart.  Despite it all I've tried my best to find the silver lining in everything.

 

 

 

I'm thankful for the awesome relationship I had with my mom.  I see so many people who don't talk to their families or who are at odds all the time.  Daughters who get along ok with their moms, but don't have much of a relationship past that.  I'm lucky to say that for 29 years she was my best friend.  While I wish with all my heart she could have stayed longer, I'd rather have had 29 years of greatness than a lifetime of just mediocre.

 

I'm thankful for my dad.  I know most days he's too hard on himself and feels like he lets us down in one way or another.  Taking on the role of both mom and dad is tough stuff and I don't think anyone else could have done it better.  Plus he's always there to help when I'm in a bind and for that I'll be forever thankful.

 

I'm thankful for my husband who took it upon himself to cook dinner Sunday night.  I may have teased him that I needed to take pictures to document this rare occasion, but I'm truly grateful to have a husband who will cook at all.  Even if it is only once every 4 years. 

 

I'm thankful for concealer, for without it, the giant bags under my eyes would be enough to scare small children.

 

I'm thankful for random 80 degree days and trips to the park.

 

I'm thankful for the free cookies at the grocery store.  Quick shopping trips with the toddler are much more bearable when his mouth is stuffed with chocolate chip goodness!

 

I'm thankful for my old school George Foreman grill that came through in the clutch when the outside grill ran out of propane.

 

I'm thankful for my boss who gave me flowers to perk up my new desk.  And my attitude.  I'd been a little snippy since they forced asked me to move.  31 year old tantrum say what?

 

And last but not least, I'm thankful for all of you.  Your kind words and prayers helped get me through the day yesterday.  The power of the blogging community will never cease to amaze me!

 

Happy Thursday Friends!

Don't forget to come back tomorrow will all your juicy confessions!

The last day

Today starts the long 10 day emotional roller coaster until October 27th.

A day that 2 years ago started out a happy day.

The day we baptized our son.

It was a day spent celebrating with family and friends.

Going to church together to welcome Jamie into the world.

A day laughing, eating {too much} good food, taking {too many} pictures and just spending time together.

One of the last beautiful weekends we had before fall really set in.

One where a frazzled new mom was trying to soak it all in.

One where the 2 1/2 month old guest of honor was fussy and cranky a good portion of the day, suffering from an ear infection which we didn't know was brewing.

One where mothers and daughters and husbands and wives nit pick at each other over silly, trivial things.

Despite all the crazy, it truly was a great day.

One I thought {at the time} I would remember forever.

And I do.

Now however, it will forever be remembered as the last day I spent with my mom.

I've replayed that day in my head more times than I can count.

I remember being in a rush to get home that afternoon after all the festivities had died down.

With a 2 1/2 hour drive ahead of us, we opted out of one last boat ride and bid everyone a fond farewell.

In the hustle and bustle of packing up I don't really even remember saying goodbye.

I remember my mom hurrying to get down to the dock, and I remember the house going quiet, realizing she had left, but I don't remember saying goodbye.

There may have been a quick hug or a "Have a safe trip home!"

But that's it.

Nothing huge or monumental.

Certainly nothing grand.

And I'm ok with that.

Or at least I try to be.

Because it's all I have.

And I have to remember, that no matter how {un}grand the goodbye may have been, it really was a great {last} day.

Our last picture together.  Taken very appropriately in front of the Mother's Wall of Life.

Friday Confessional

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I have a problem with buying things I HAVE.TO.HAVE only to use them for 2 weeks or less.  If I had a dime for every hair product or beauty item collecting dust under my sink I'd be a rich woman.

I can't do my {ahem} "business" in a public bathroom unless I'm the only one in there.  What can I say, a girl needs a little privacy in life.

I don't really understand people who monogram everything.  Especially kids clothes.  I get that personalization is cute.  I'm guilty of buying Jamie a shirt or two for holidays or birthdays.  But just to wear on some run of the mill Tuesday?  Eh.  Not my thing.  Don't even get me started on smocking and jon-jons.

One morning I discovered our bathroom had no more TP.  Instead of getting a new roll, I just went to the other bathroom.

The dog puked on the floor yesterday.  I pretended not to see it so the husband would clean it up when he got home.  Lazy?  Yes.  I call it payback for giving me this wretched cold he claimed was allergies.

I found {and pulled} five gray hairs.  Five.  If that old wives tale is true I will have about 15 in a few weeks.  Joy.

My child has finally figured out how to open his door.  Instead of celebrating his new found skill I'm contemplating running to Target to buy a childproof knob cover.  Screw independence, I can't have him roaming the house at all hours of the night.

I'm the girl who pins her own stuff to keep my recipes all in one place.  Yep, that's me.  One step below the person who likes their own pictures on Instagram.

I just got an email from my boss that I have to move desks.  TODAY.  So I can sit at temporary desk with no phone and no computer for a week only to move AGAIN the following week.  The tantrum I'm about to throw would rival my 2 year olds any day.

Happy freakin' Friday people.
Link up and share your confessions!

Thankful Thursday

I didn't completely abandon my challenge.

I'm just not a blog everyday kinda girl, especially when I feel forced to do it.

Which seems silly since I chose to do this and even picked the topic, but whatever.

It is what it is.

So instead I'm changing up the rules a bit, because it's my challenge and I'll do what I want to.

I'm going to post all my thanks for the week on Thursdays, heck maybe I will continue it past October.

This week I'm giving thanks.....

To friends who will babysit for you last minute

For date nights with my husband

For boots and fuzzy hat kinda weather

For giant ass camping chairs

For a KState WIN!  I will always give thanks to beating those silly Jayhawks!

To my son, who was a total trooper at the game.  Surviving on little sleep, and no nap.  He's a true Wildcat fan though and though! 

To the first fire of the season!

To lazy Sundays at home

For NyQuill.  It's the only thing that helps me sort of sleep through this stupid cold.



What are you thankful for this week?
Don't forget to stop by tomorrow to cleanse your soul with a few Friday Confessions!

Fattitude

I saw this on Pinterest the other day and the words really hit home.
I remember back in January when I started this whole journey, looking back at pictures from before our wedding and thinking how skinny I looked.  And how foolish I was back then to think I was fat.  That I would kill to be that "fat" now.  That would make me happy.
Well. 
Here I am. 
That "fat." 
And I still don't always feel any less fat than the girl from 73 pounds ago.
I guess by now I thought I'd be happier with my body.
Have more self confidence.
The truth of the matter is I don't.
Whenever anyone compliments me, the first words out of my mouth are almost always, "Yeah, I'm better than I was, but I still have xxx amount to go!"
And I'm 100% sure my husband is sick of hearing me pick myself apart every.single.day.
Talk about a turn off.
We're getting ready to take some new family pictures and I thought I knew just what I wanted to wear.
A pair of colored skinny jeans, chambray shirt and boots.
You know.  The new blogger uniform.
I was going to rock it!
I was so confident I went out and bought said outfit without even trying it on.
I came home, put it on, and was frightened by what I saw.
Colored denim must be made for people with no thighs.  Or cellulite.  Because I felt like each and every dimple on my ass was now just highlighted by mustard colored jeans.  It was bad.
The shirt was ok.  But it was loose and kind of just hung there giving me no shape whatsover.  A look apparently thin people can pull off, but not me.  I tried it with a belt, but it just got more awkward.
It kind of blew the wind out of my sails.
I was seriously bummed.
Ever since I just can't seem to shake the "woe is me" fattitude.  (yes I just made that word up)
All I can focus is on is how much more I have left.
And then I wonder, when I finally reach that magical number...then will I be happy?
What if it's still not good enough.
In my head I know how much I've accomplished.  I can see the numbers in black and white.  Now I'm just waiting for my heart to catch up.
I need to remember this is a journey, not a race.
And I need to be proud of how far I've come, not beat myself up for the road that still lies ahead.

Tasty Tuesday: Crockpot Vegetable Beef Soup

Sunday morning I got this mad craving for some vegetable beef soup.

Blame it on fall, or the onset of illness that has invaded our house, but I needed some comfort food STAT!

I wanted something easy that I could throw in the crockpot and let simmer all day, so I did a quick google search and this is what I came up with.  Now if you came here looking for some homemade, all organic, I grew the vegetables in my back yard and slaughtered the free range, grass fed cow myself kinda recipe..... please leave now.  You won't find that here today.  (Or let's be honest, any day)  Because I said I wanted something QUICK and EASY.  I changed a few things based on the comments in the reviews section, so I will give it to you exactly how I made it.  A few people also mentioned they substituted frozen or fresh in lieu of canned, so if that's more your style, go for it!  I was super pleased with how this came out, it was delicious and will definitely be made again! 

Image Courtesy of Google Images. 
Mine looked like that, minus the fancy garnish and soup bowl, so let's just pretend.

 

Crockpot Vegetable Beef Soup

what you need:
1 pound cubed beef stew meat
1 (15.25 oz) can whole kernel corn, undrained
1 (15 oz) can green beans
1 (15 oz) can carrots with juice
1 (15 oz) can sliced potatoes with juice
1 (15 oz) can crushed tomatoes
1 (15 oz) can beef broth
1 package beef with onion soup mix
salt and pepper to taste
****I bought the no salt added/low sodium version of everything****

what you do:
Dump everything into crockpot.  Stir.  Set on low for at least 6 hours.

Makes 6 servings.  WW: 9 points+ per 2 cup serving.

Bon Appetite!

Friday Confessional

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Last week I took Jamie to the park and he had a nonstop runny nose.  I hadn't planned on this and therefore brought nothing.  So I used my shirt.

I'm tempted to buy crappy Halloween candy to pass out so there's not some bag of chocolaty goodness sitting around my house saying "EAT ME!"

I hate the store Forever 21.  I've tried to like it.  I see so many other people find cute stuff there, but each time I walk in it's like a clusterf*ck of disorganized racks.  I can't take it.  It was also a bit of turn off when my size TWO, skinny as a freakin rail, sorority sister had to buy a size large.  I pretty much wrote them off that day.

I love Wilson Phillips.  As in the band.  You better believe anytime I'm in the car and "Hold On" comes on the radio, I'm gonna crank that shit and sing my heart out.

While I really appreciate that my husband is trying to teach our son some independence, I could have done without the new 10 minute process he's created by letting him get into his carseat "ALL BY MYSELF."  Sometime it really was easier when he was a helpless baby.

I think TVs hanging on the wall are the worst home design feature ever.  Especially over a fireplace.  Don't get me wrong, I'm not tying to hide the fact that we own a TV, but I'm not going to prominently hang it on my wall so it's the focal point of the room.  The only exception to this is in a basement or man den.

I love me some pumpkin, but I think Pinterest has created a pumpkin explosion.  I get it.  It's fall, people like it.  But not EVERYTHING I make in the next 3 months requires a can of the orange stuff.  I'm sorry.  I draw the line at pumpkin chili.  Gross.

I can't whistle.  Or wink.

Sometimes when I'm on Facebook and see that some skinny bitch I went to highschool with is fat now, I smile.

Ok.  Every time.


Anything you need to get off your chest this week?
Link up!
Happy Friday friends!

Day 3 {and 4}: Giving thanks....

So it's pretty safe to say I suck at forced blogging.

Even when I make up the topic I can't keep on track!

Regardless, I've still been mentally bookmarking my daily thanks.

It's amazing when you're more aware of it, how much good there really is in your world.

So even if I'm not so stellar at putting the words on paper, I'm loving this challenge nonetheless!

For day 3 I'm giving thanks to single moms.  And military moms.  Or any parent out there doing this on their own.

I don't know how you do it day in and day out.

I've been "single" momming it most of this week due to the hubs crazy work schedule and it's hard.

Like real hard.

To be the only person in charge knowing you don't have any back up reinforcement coming?

You ladies rock my socks.

Cause 3 days into this and I miss my parenting partner in crime like woah.

Today I want to give thanks to fall.  More specifically, fall in the Midwest!

I know I've said it a million times, but I could NEVER live somewhere that doesn't have true seasons.

I love fall WAY to much to give it up for the sun and sand.

Sure come January when all you warm weather dwellers are posting pictures in swimsuits on the beach while I'm digging myself out of a snowdrift I might be a teensy bit jealous.

But today when it was a crisp 60 degrees and all the leaves are just starting to turn making my drive along I-35 rather picturesque, I'm glad I'm not still sweating my tits off in triple digit temps.

There's nothing better than a cool fall night, sitting by a fire or snuggling up with a blanket.

I just love this time of year!

Happy Thursday Friends!
Come on back tomorrow to cleanse your souls with a little Friday Confessional!

Day 2: Giving Thanks....for never skipping a beat

Tonight I got an out of the blue text from my 4th grade bestie.

Her little girl was in bed.  I had just put Jamie to bed.

It was perfect timing.

Which hasn't happened for us in WAY too long.

We hadn't really talked since our last visit in March, so a phone call was LONG overdue.

We chatted about everything and anything for over an hour.

We caught each other up on the good, the bad, the ugly and everything in between.

It was exactly what we both needed.

A pick-me up for the best friend soul.

I love how every time we talk, no matter how long it's been, we pick up right where we left off.

Not everyone is lucky enough to have friends like that.

I'm lucky enough to have three.

So today I'm giving thanks for best friends, old and new.

The kind you can talk to and it's like you never skipped a beat.

Day 1: Giving Thanks.... to Stop and Smell the Roses

Here I am already a day behind.

Oops!

This doesn't bode well for the next 30 days now does it....

Regardless I was still thankful for something yesterday.

My son.

Now I'm pretty sure this won't be the last time I'm thankful for him this month, but yesterday he really taught me a lesson.

Everyday I wake up and think, how is it October already.

Where has the year gone?

How is my son 2 already?

How has it almost been 2 years since we said goodbye to my mom.

How is time flying by so fast.

But I never do anything to try and slow it down.

In fact it's usually quite the opposite.

I wish the day away so it can be time to go home.

I count the minutes until my husband walks through the door, and most days it's never fast enough.

I look forward to bed time so I can finally have a moment to myself.

I'm literally wishing time away.

No wonder it's going by at the speed of light.

Yesterday my son got me to slow down.

As we walked out of daycare yesterday the fountain and garden area in the front of the building caught his eye.

 I kept pestering him that is was time to leave.

Let's go.

Come on.

Get in the car.

Hurry up.

But why.

We didn't have any plans.

We had no real reason to get home.

We actually had time to just sit.

So when he climbed up on the park bench and proclaimed he was going to sit and stay awhile.

I gave in.

I sat down right next to him and we talked.

He showed me the October calendar he made at school and pointed out all the colors he used.

He told me how he played with Hanna.

And Natalie pulled his hair. {Always quick to rat you out this one}

How Sam was scared during the fire drill {Which actually happened last week, but who's counting}

That he ate pancakes for breakfast and looked at pictures of  May-May's {Miss Mary's} granddaughter.

He filled me in on his entire little 2 year old day.

It was the best part of my entire day and to think it almost didn't even happen.

So today I'm saying thank you to my son.

It was nice to just stop and smell the roses.

31 Days of Giving Thanks

I'm guessing by now you've all heard of The Nester's 31 day Project.  The rules are easy.  Write every day.  For 31 days.  About any topic of your choosing.  Simple enough right?

So for the next 31 days I'm challenging myself.  Challenging myself to find just ONE thing in everyday, whether it be big or small, to be thankful for.  In the humdrum of everyday life it's easy to get caught up in all that's going wrong in my life, but not often enough do I step back to really appreciate all that's GOOD in my life.  It's time to change that.

I still plan on posting as usual, this is just a little something extra I plan on doing at the end of each day.  Maybe it will even inspire a few of you to stop and think of things to be thankful for in your day too!

Here goes nothing!